Chess, Chess, Chess! Aaaah! I love her. She needs a hug and a big freaking smack upside her head. Gosh, she just seems to make all of the wrong decisions!This is an interesting and absolutely engrossing series. Now that the drug addict issues aren't so much of a shock, I've settled in to just enjoy the story. But my GOD! I am in such a mess right now, emotionally. Chess is so messed up! Her relationship with Terrible during the first book and the beginning of this book is fairly settled, I thought. Terrible is her big, badass protector from all things negative, really. Someone says something to hurt Chess' feelings? Terrible threatens to break their neck. Someone does something to Chess that they shouldn't be doing? Terrible beats their face in. Terrible is AWESOME!!! Not only is he an awesome, protective badass, but he has also become her one and only friend. And we learn a couple of new things about the real Terrible; the man behind the legend, that make him even more endearing. Deep down, he's a wonderful guy. I love how Chess sees him when he smiles. She says it changes him. Lets the real Terrible show. So here comes Chess, to EF IT ALL UP! This is where wishful smacking comes in, because goodness! I don't know when I've wanted to scream at a character more. Thing is, I don't think anyone could beat up Chess more than she beats up herself. This girl is just so down on herself. "She woke up with the sheets tangled around her like a snake, sweaty and shivering on her rumpled bed, feeling like she'd been fighting instead of sleeping. Her head ached. her muscles ached. She felt dirty and tired and old, so old, like she'd been alive a hundred years instead of twenty-four. Like everything good that would ever happen to her had already happened, and all she had to look forward to now was death."And in this dreary, dystopian Downside, everyone seems to be out for themselves. To me, the ghosts and the magic aren't what make this story. It's the people. Its as if the atmosphere of hopelessness pervades everywhere, and it forces people's true colors to shine through. Granted, most of the colors are black and brown and gray. But though Chess has issues, she also can still see the beauty in the world, for what it used to be. One scene hit me really hard. And this scene happens just a few moments before a huge turning point for Chess, a crushing blow that just tore me up. Chess is contemplating an angel statue in a graveyard. In this world, religion is outlawed, as it has been proven to be false."Chess had seen images of angels before, of course. The Archives were full of them. But something about this one, its stone head bowed as if under a terrible weight of sadness, its wings half unfurled, its hand pressed together, make something in her chest ache. So peaceful. What had it felt like, to have faith like that? To believe that death brought something better, brought peace and unity with something greater than oneself?"What a poignant moment for Chess, a woman so good at self reflection. Only she gets it so wrong, every time. "...as if her soul had tried to claw its way out of her body and failed. Or perhaps it hadn't failed. She felt particularly empty this morning. Maybe that's what was missing. She almost hoped it was."So I suppose this sounds like a sort of depressing book, but its not. It actually really gives me hope for Chess. She's a good person, doing bad things. Rarely do we get an anti-heroine, but Chess is definitely one. And the fact that we get to be inside her head and walk through these struggles with her, see the reasons behind her actions, makes her almost forgivable. Certainly loveable. I am so READY for the next book. It's going to be a long night, because though its midnight right now, I've GOT to move on. I generally have to savor a series or I get bored with it, but I feel so connected to these characters! Chess and Terrible are so intense! Even Lex, Chess's pseudo-lover/boyfriend/drug supplier, isn't a bad guy. I certainly don't want Chess to end up with him, but I've gotta know what happens!!! Ms. Kane, please, please, PLEASE say there is a light at the end of this tunnel! I can't envision a perfectly rainbows and sunshine ending, but I think I'll go into a major depression if I don't get SOMETHING good for Chess, and SOON!
